Friday, March 28, 2008

All Apologies

i don't know if i've scared the few, but very dear to me, readers i have by not being around much lately. Thank you, slut on display, for your thoughtful message. i did receive it, and it was wonderful of you to show concern.

By way of paltry explanation, Daddy and i hadn't been playing much, i was out of work, i was feeling very very low, and, frankly, i thought Daddy was on the edge of releasing me. i was very concerned, but didn't want to make it any more real to me by blogging about it. When something is upsetting me, my first instinct is to clam up about it. i'm a bit on the secretive side, for all my openness about my sex life and BDSM experiences.

But! A very important BUT, Daddy has reassured me, and i feel relatively confident about it. He still wants me, and i am still His little girl.

i'm relieved. For the life of me, i swear, i don't know what i did. Maybe it wasn't really me. Daddy's secretive, too. Daddy doesn't tell me about things that don't have to do with me. i know this, and i understand it. But i felt like He didn't want me anymore, and just wasn't telling me. i was confused and hurt. He was saying what a good girl i've been lately, and that i haven't needed to be punished in such a long time, but He was still acting like He didn't want me. What had i done?

Maybe if i had bitten the bullet and opened up to all of you, you would have told me not to worry. That people go through things the rest of us aren't always privy to, and if He says He wants you, then you just have to accept that...Maybe that's what would have happened, maybe not...

Anyway, like i said, everything appears to be back to what W/we call "normal"...teeheehee...and i just might be getting that glow back....;)

2 comments:

essence said...

i'm glad you are back. i too tend to retreat when i have something heavy going on, and those times i need reassurance as well.

i've been down in the dumps a bit over the winter but i feel like i am starting to come out of it a bit.

i hope you are doing well, and found work too.

take care
essence

slut on display said...

Daddies don't just stop wanting their little girls but I understand your fear and suspect that I would have felt the same way. (Even worse actually, when I think that I'm not wanted anymore I end things and hide, so I think you've done a good job hanging in there.)

I hope that you've found a new employment and are feeling better still.

xx