Saturday, August 29, 2009

Warning: It's a Long One! :)

Yesterday I went to visit Mari at the hospital, and she had (apparently jokingly) requested that I get made up and dressed up for her. I took her seriously, tho I didn't wear the requested high heels, and spent a lot of time on my hair, makeup, and dress choice. I think I spent an hour just on my hair! Heh heh Mari appreciated it tho, and she gave me some very sweet compliments when I walked in. Not the least of which was when she told me that whenever I returned to the room from stepping out for a smoke that it struck her anew how pretty I was. She's such a doll. Thanks Mari, you looked beautiful, too! :)

So, due to my having been all dolled up to please Mari, I didn't have to do too much to myself for M's visit. I thought I'd do something little different for him and put on some lingerie. I chose a sheer net type lace black cami top with spaghetti straps with a deep v neckline, and a pair of bikini panties of the same material with a small chiffon ruffle/bow on the butt. Cute and sexy, and it had a 60's feel to it to match the hairstyle and makeup I had done earlier.

M was surprised to see my get up when he walked in. He gave me several long looks up and down ;he's rarely seen me in lingerie. He said I looked "sexy" in the outfit. He curled up next to me and slid his hand up and down my bare legs, settling his hand between my thighs nestled in my crotch. He continued with a bit more flattery and sweet talk, and I melted under his attentions.

I told M that I wanted him to fuck me 2 ways this visit. I asked him if he remembered last week when he said he wanted me to touch him all over, and how I had licked, nibbled, sucked, kissed, caressed, etc. When he said yes, I told him that I wanted that, too, and that I wanted to feel desired and wanted and cherished. He answered that I was desired and wanted, and that he would do that for me. I also told him that I wanted really nasty dirty fucking, too; with his tongue and cock in my ass. Needless to say, he smiling agreed to that, also. ;)

M was hungry and ordered a pizza. I believe it was me who said, that we should get a fuck in before the pizza arrived, suggesting that M should fuck my ass because we wouldn't have time to do the "sweet" sex before M had to run downstairs to pay the delivery guy. M, always enthusiastic to be in my ass, thought it was an excellent idea. Heh heh

M stroked my clit, already wet from our kissing, and unzipped his pants. He was kneeling beside me as I laid on my back, and I reached for his cock hungry as ever to have him in my mouth. I got up on my hands and knees as M slid off the bed, standing on the side with his cock straining towards my face. The head of his cock was shiny with my saliva and I popped in back into my mouth, moaning deep from my throat as I slurped away.

It turns me on I when I see a thread of spit clinging from my mouth to the tip of M's cock when I pull away, and sometimes I slip him out of my mouth just to get a quick glimpse of it. I've also recently developed a fascination in letting a thick stream of saliva drop from my mouth onto M's cock using it to lubricate my hand stroking his shaft. M's skin is a golden olive shade, and his cock is darker with a bit of purple to it when not aroused, or just becoming erect. But as his desire increases and his erection grows completely rigid, the head of his cock is red and engorged. It makes my mouth water to see it, and when he emerges from my mouth glistening and wet from pounding away at my face, it only makes me greedy for more.

When I'm blowing M I'm usually on my hands and knees as he kneels or stands in front of me. M loves this position because it gives him a view of my back, small waist, and round ass. I know when he's admiring the landscape of my body when I feel his hands run down my spine and give my ass a squeeze, or over the sides of my ribs and into the crack of my; slipping a finger into my cunt for a quick assurance of my wetness.


M disengaged me from his cock and turned me around to face the opposite direction. He nudged me with his hands to shuffle across the bed to make room for him to climb on, and then bent down to tongue my ass. I have never been very enthusiastic about having my ass licked. It didn't bother me, but it never drove me mad with desire either, but with M's hands gripping my ass, his fingers digging into my ass cheeks spreading them open, I wriggled and moaned with pleasure at his tongue's frenzied rimming and dipping into my asshole.

My reared up and wedged the head of his cock between my pussy lips. When he entered me I could feel every inch of him. I was so tight, or he was so thick, or both, that I was able to discern the ridge of the head of his cock separate from the shaft. The walls of my cunt were closed tight around him the pace of his thrusting was slowed, and when he pulled back from a deep thrust it felt like my cunt was reluctant to let him go. I felt as if my cunt was trying to suck him back in even has he was sliding out.

I heard M gasp and moan behind me, and I turned to look at him over my shoulder. His face was directly above my right shoulder and he kissed me deeply when I faced him. He was using one hand to balance himself and the other he used to pull my up to him, my back fitting snugly against his chest and stomach.

When he released me it was to empty my pussy of his cock and to press it against my asshole. I felt a glob of spit land in the crack of my ass just above my asshole and he used it to further lubricate my hole before stuffing me full of his meat once again.


For as easily as he slipped in my ass it still ached to have him in there. It's been a few weeks since he's had my ass, so some of his thrusts were quite painful. But I've been looking forward to some pain, and I always encourage M to fuck me hard and deep during anal. I could hear his moans and grunts of pleasure, and I felt him press down on me with his chest, flattening me to the mattress. He bent my right leg to have complete access to ram my ass. He placed his thumbs under either cheek spreading me wider, and wrapped his remaining fingers around the swell of my cheeks squeezing my flesh tightly using his tight grip to work my back and forth thrusting in as deep as possible.

My arms were curled up under my chest when I felt him reaching from behind me to clasp my wrists. M pulled my arms up and back and increased the speed and depth of his pounding. My grunting and whimpering became louder, and I wouldn't say I was a screamer, but as he accelerated to his orgasms, I began to scream. He was pulling my arms so far back that my chest lifted from off of the bed, and I could sense his back arching right before his orgasm. M came into my ass, pulsing and twitching, as he collapsed onto my back, gasping for air. When M got off the bed, he gave my broken foot a little kiss before going to the bathroom to wash off.

We cleaned up quickly and M said he was starving "just like clockwork," referring to how he and I may not be hungry before we fuck, but that right after we both become ravenous. Good thing for us the pizza arrived just then, and M went down to get it while I finished cleaning myself. We ate while trying to watch TV, but nothing of interest was on.

We chatted for a while, but our sexual thirst wasn't quenched. We fucked in one of my favorite positions, legs over his shoulders so he can get in so deep. His kisses, so deep. My groans, so deep. And he told me he wanted to cum in my mouth, and I had expressed to him earlier in the week that I want to be on my knees in front of him sucking his cock. He stood up, grabbed my hand, and a stack of floor pillows, and walked over to my full length mirror. He said he wanted to be able to watch me while i blew him. I have often tried to figure out a way to incorporate my mirror into our sex, but this was the first time we'd actually done it.

I enthusiastically, went down on him, not bothering to tease and tempt. I raised my arms and clung to him, giving him what I hoped was a clear profile of my breasts, stomach, hips, and ass. I took as much of him down my throat as I could, and I felt my juices soaking my thighs. My chin was slippery with spit, and I could feel how wet I had gotten his balls when I cupped them in my hand. The back of my throat was raw from repeatedly being pounding, but I barely felt it as he held my head in place and fucked my mouth brutally. M grunted loudly with each of the final thrust of his orgasm.


I lapped at him a few more times, but M is extremely sensitive directly after cumming so he can't take too much of that. He helped me up and took me by the hand to lay beside him back on my bed. He splayed out on his back contentedly exhausted. We chatted for a while more, but I wasn't done with him, yet.


The last time we fucked that night began with him in my cunt and ended with him in my ass. Even tho it was the third time, or maybe because of it, I think it was the wetest I got all evening. I was, again, flat on my belly, right leg bent and left leg straight, with M's cock ramming my asshole. I reached underneath myself and felt my juices smeared all over my groin, and my clit was bursting out from hood, hard and so sensitive. With the back of my hand pressed I could feel an enormous very wet spot on my sheet, and I thought to myself that I wanted M to feel all of this, too. I grabbed his hand from behind my and placed it on my pussy and began to play with my clit. He slid 1, then 2, fingers inside of me and increased the speed and force of his thrusting.


All I could say was "Fuck!" and "Oh god!" over and over. I clutched at my pillows and and M rested his head on my shoulder. He held my hips down on the bed and ground into me, pull out a bit, and then pounded me without restraint. His groaning when he came was the loudest they'd been all night. My ass throbbed from the onslaught, and I wiped the hair away from my damp face and smiled with a sigh. M kissed me as I continued to grin with pleasure and glowing pride at having satisfied M so thoroughly.


We fell asleep cuddled in each other's arms, completely sated.


The next morning I woke up early. M has an alarm that goes off at 7am and I thought I'd send him a little text message to find later on in the day. It was just a little compliment "You're so sexy", and I thought it would make him smile. I also called and left a voicemail to say "Pssst. You're so sexy and handsome." Heh heh. Everyone likes a compliment. ;) But he woke up when he heard the text message bell, and read it right then. Poop. :( But it did make him smile. :D


When he got back into bed from the bathroom, I asked him about his repeated visits to the online dating site. He was still tired, owing to the early hour, and I agreed to put it off until we woke up a bit later. I read some more of my book and went back to sleep with M.


Later that morning, nearly afternoon, when M woke up. I asked him what he wanted for breakfast and he chose a Greek omelet. I also made bacon and toast with homemade lemon curd. It surprises me that he's still surprised when I hand him plates of food. He always makes an appreciative little "Wow," when I place his food in front of him. It's very gratifying and flattering that I can still impress him with my cooking. :)


As we laid in bed I scratched M's back, something he enjoys very much, and we talked about the dating website, anal sex, and I chastised gently him for not appreciating how unique and special I am. I spoke of the desirable qualities I posses and how I don't utilize some of the more common and distasteful traits girls against guys, namely that I wasn't spiteful or vindictive, rarely petty, that I don't emotionally blackmail or act passive aggressively. I'm not perfect by any means, but I have so much to offer someone I care for, and I love M, and so few of the usual characteristics that guys complain about girls, and we have such a great time when we're together, that I don't understand why he wants to pursue other girls. What more could he want? What is the likelihood that he would get along with so well, have such great chemistry with, another girl and have her be as attractive, sexy, intelligent and fun?


He was curled into my side, my arms around him, and his head on my shoulder as I spoke to him about this. He reached up and cupped my cheek pulling my face down to his, and kissed me. His lips were soft and his tongue was gentle and tender. He kissed my bottom lip alone, as well as my nose and my forehead. He caressed the side of my neck with his fingertips, stroking from my shoulder to my jaw. He cupped my breast and ran his hand down my side, over my ribs to rest on my waist. M reached back up to my shoulder and rolled me onto my back.


Again with a featherlight touch he stroked me from my shoulder, down my stomach, over the tops of my thighs, and up the crease between my thighs. He was barely touching me with his fingertips, but my body quivered and my breathing quickened. My eyes were closed so I don't know where he was looking, but I felt his mouth on my ear when I heard him say "I'm getting ready to lick your pussy. You know that right?" and then he whispered, "I haven't fisted you in a while..." I swear I blushed.


And then M was between my legs. I felt shy to have him down there. He didn't allow me to close my legs, and I felt his fingers tickling the inside of my thighs stroking the crease of my crotch and lingering over my dripping cunt. When his tongue, so velvety thick and wet, slid over my clit I moaned and sunk deeper into the mattress. I had no problem keeping my legs open for him as he lapped and suck at my clit. His lips plucked at the sensitive bit of burning flesh and I ran my fingers thru his hair unable to articulate how good it felt.


1 thick finger, than 2, then 3 entered me. My hands clenched and released piles of sheet, and my breathing was ragged. I lifted my hips to his mouth and fingers as he worked more of his hand into me. His mouth continued kissing my clit and he twisted his hand to get more in with me gasping at the filling and extreme stretching I was submitting to.


I couldn't take his entire hand, but he had succeeded in arousing me to the point where I was wild to be fucked. He sat up and I pulled his cock to me as he placed the soles of my feet on his chest just below his collarbone. His hands held me behind the back of my knees firmly in place and he slid in and out of me slowly but deliberately. He kept an even rhythm and stroked my clit at the same rhythm with his thumb letting a stream of spit drop from his lips onto the hood of my clit to slick me up. I looked up at him whispering "My god you're gorgeous," panting and whimpering. I looked into his eyes and felt liquid fire wash over me. We rolled around, on our sides on my back, M leaning back to look at me.


M kissed me over and over, across my face and on my neck. He encircled my throat with his hand , but it was more of a hug than choking, quickly releasing me to kiss again. We looked into each other's eyes as he pumped into me, and I reached beneath my ass to take his balls in my hand for soft squeezes. I stroked his perineum , tickling along the ridge, telling M how much I loved to feel and lick this spot on him. I told him I wish he could cum in me, and he asked where I wanted him to cum. I told him I didn't care and he said he wanted me to squeeze his balls while he came in my mouth.


Some deep quick thrusts and M pulled out, shooting into my mouth and landing some drops on my chest and face. I licked what cum remained on the head of cock savoring the taste of him. He gathered the remaining puddles on his fingers and fed them to me. I sucked and licked at his fingers, smiling and nibbling to get it all. Then I received my after sex kiss and we snuggled basking in the afterglow. :)


I noticed M looking at my legs while I had my feet propped on his chest; I love when he "checks me out". I love when we lock eyes and then the sensations


Later we were talking and my hand drifted to his cock absentmindedly. I began to stroke him and he became erect under my touch. M rolled onto his side to face me and played with my clit. In that position I couldn't get a good angle to reach M's cock, but he was making me crazy aroused with his touch. I don't normally go in for 69, but I had to have him in my mouth, so I spun around and placed my pussy within licking distance of M as I became to suck his cock.


I went wild with him again going down on me, and I refused to let up on the blowjob I was giving him. My guttural moans kept in time with the bobbing of my head and M didn't let up on my clit, slipping a finger into me periodically.


When he rolled onto his back it was a bit easier for me to concentrate on pleasuring him, but by then I couldn't take it. I climbed on top of M and rode him hard. M is no longer as passive when I'm on top and it has become much more satisfying for me to be in that position. His thrusting up forces his cock further into me, and our bodies sync up so easily. I abandoned all reserve and I bucked and slammed my cunt down on M while he strained and lifted me, filling me to the hilt.


I kiss him and try to catch my breathe after I've cum. M asks me, "Did you?", and I murmur "Yes." He tells me to go to the side, and i climb off and lay back. He aims his cock into me and holds me spread by the back of my thighs. I reach for his balls again, and this time he doesn't take me sweetly. He fucks me hard and fast and hits my cervix like a jackhammer. I look up at him with pleading eyes as he hammers into my cunt, mewling like a kitten.


I prop myself up on my hands and lick at his lips and murmur that I want him to fuck me from behind and to put his finger in my ass. He thrusts a few more times and then I'm emptied and flipped into doggie style. M licks my asshole, and slides his cock into my cunt, and then a finger fills my ass. I clenched my eyes tight and my whole body shot thru with electricity. M eventually replaced his finger with his cock and came in my ass. I think that's the most anal we've ever had in one visit! Heh heh. :D

Later I asked him if he was surprised that I came right out and asked him to put his finger in my ass, and he asked me if I was surprised that he didn't say a word and just did it immediately. I don't think either of us should be surprised anymore about the desire for kinky activities or the other's willingness to participate in them. M told me that one of the things he likes about me is how he knows he could explore anything sexual he may be curious about with me and not have to worry about me being freaked out by a what he says.

I again asked him if he would write a post/letter as my birthday present. I think he'll do it, but I don't know that it will end up being posted here. That'll be up to him. It probably won't be kinky or erotic, tho I wouldn't mind if he included some of that sort of thing. I mainly want to hear his thoughts on the last year's events, and I want to know what his feelings are and how they've developed. We'll see how long it takes for him to do it. I might have to sit him down on my computer to actually get it done. Ha!

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Happy Birthday to Me

Last Friday I met with Mari, my girlfriend from the west coast who's here to get her sex reassignment surgery, and we had a great time. She's gorgeous and you'd probably not know she was born male if you didn't already know. She's into BDSM and was owned for a few months not too long ago, but it didn't work out. We have a slightly Domme/sub relationship, but it has more of a Big Sister/little sister feel to it.

We went to lunch at an Italian place close to the train station where I met her. I think it's a chain place, or maybe there's just a few other locations, but it's authentic, not like crappy Olive Garden or anywhere like that. We didn't have any cocktails, her because she was having her surgery in a couple days, and me because I'm on meds due to my broken foot. We laughed alot during lunch and chatted like old friends.

After lunch we went to visit the record label her band is signed to. It also happens to be the label M works for. We took the train and waited for one of the girls who works at the label to come pick us up. Mari forgot to introduce me to Betsy when we got into the car, so I introduced myself. I always feel a little weird when I have to do that, and neither Mari nor I made any explanation about who I was or what my relationship to Mari was.

When we got to the record company's location Betsy showed us around and introduced us to everyone. A few of the guys I had met before, introduced on the few occasions M has asked me to come out with him and his friends. When we got into the warehouse portion of the building, we stood around chatting with Betsy and M walked up to us. He walked over to me saying "Hi," and reaching out to touch my stomach. Then he leaned in and kissed me on the mouth.

I was surprised he touched me so intimately and kissed me in front of his co-workers and boss. Mari told me later that I was visibly surprised, but I have to say I was pleased also. I felt much better about being there knowing M wasn't uncomfortable with it. Betsy was surprised to see M kiss me, she probably didn't know M was seeing anyone, and she had no idea who I was aside from being there with Mari. I doubt M talks about me to his co-workers, and he probably never mentions that he's my boyfriend, or whatever it is our relationship would be called right now...

I sat down next to M at his desk for a while to put my injured foot up, and eventually it was decided that Gordon, the label manager, and Betsy would take Mari and I out for drinks. M and I usually are together on Friday nights, so I asked if he wanted to meet us at the bar/restaurant where we were going to be. M had to go home and shower first, so he said he'd meet us there. I walked him out, and he called me to him for a kiss before he left.

Mari, Betsy, Gordon and I were seated at a roomy table, and we chatted. The three of them started talking about death metal and grindcore (the music Mari plays and the genre of bands signed to the label), and I couldn't really participate in the conversation. I didn't feel left out, but I'm not knowledgeable enough to contribute to discussions on the topic. Mari talked about her upcoming surgery and her friends out west and in her band. It was very easy and comfortable, and Betsy and Gordon are really sweet and personable, not difficult to talk to at all.

I went out to have a cigarette, and that's when M showed up. We went in when I was done, and he ordered a beer. I had decided to have a few cocktails when we got there, but I was being careful not to overdue because of my meds. Conversation continued easily, just as it was all night, and at one point I told a really corny, slightly off color joke, that my Mom told me once. M knew the punchline, and by way of explanation for the joke's silliness, I confessed that my mom had told it to me, and that it was her favorite. M said that his mom had told him the same joke, and that it was her favorite, too. I thought it was an interesting coincidence.

M had his bike so the rest of the group dropped me off at the train station and M and I went back to my place. I asked him if he'd run to the store for me, and I went up to my apt. A little later M called to say that his card was rejected, and when he came back he looked up his bank account info to find all sorts of problems. He called the 800 number and got no help from the first guy he talked to, who ended up hanging up on him! The second person he talked to was more helpful, but there didn't seem to be anything anyone could do right then.

M was, understandably, upset. I had issues with my previous bank and eventually left because of it. I saw on the news recently that the banks are keeping themselves solvent, even profiting, from an increase in overdraft fee charges. So, I was upset for M, and pissed for him, but there wasn't much I could do except lend him $20 to cover some withdrawals, if necessary.

I had asked him if he'd still go to the store for me, but he wasn't in a hurry, and I didn't want to be insensitive to what he was going thru, so I ended up walking, more like limping, to the store myself. Actually, I didn't have the strength to go all the way to the store, so I went to the bar instead. It's more expensive, but I really didn't feel like hauling my ass all the way to 7-11. And during the few minutes I waited for change and fed the machine, I got hit on?! This guy comes up to me and starts chatting me up. I wasn't in the mood, so I didn't even bother to look up when he spoke to me. I told him I was just here to buy smokes, and he said I should come back and hang out.

On the way home I started to think about how much time M's been spending on the online dating site we met on. Lately, he's been visiting it 2 or 3 times a day, for a few hours at a time. He's on first thing in the morning, late at night, and at work. I started to think about how he can't find the time to text me or call me, yet finds time to visit this website. His status is "single" on the website. I got upset, very upset.

When I got to my apartment I undressed and washed my face. M was under the covers spread out in my bed. I wedged myself on the bit of bed that was free and opened my book to read. He asked me what was wrong, and I didn't want to upset him more and I didn't really know how to talk about it, so I said I was fine. He was curled up on my side and I was sitting up reading my book when he kissed my arm and asked me what was wrong again. I said that nothing was wrong.

I guess he thought I was angry with him for raging about the bank because he apologized for ranting about it. I told him I completely understood and that I was definitely not angry with him about that. I told him that under the circumstances I thought he was justified in his anger, and that I had behaved worse when dealing with my banks, as well as poor customer service, before.

He kissed my arm again, and I closed my book, rolling over to go to sleep. I started to tear up, but I didn't allow myself to cry. He wished me "Happy Birthday." M said to me that he wanted to make me feel good. I told M quietly how it upset me that he was on the dating site, and he said to me "You don't know how beautiful you are," and I rolled over to face him. His cock was hard, and he pressed it against my hip saying that I made him so hard. I said that I hadn't done anything, and that he wasn't hard from me. He said that I didn't need to touch him. He told me that when I came into the apartment from running to get the smokes, he watched me undress, and as I was standing in front of my dresser he thought to himself how perfect my body was. He said looking at my ass made him want to bend me over my chair and bury his face between my cheeks and lick my asshole. He said he wanted to kiss me, cupped my face in his hand, and asked "May I kiss you?" I said "I told you that you can do whatever you want to me."

He kissed me, and touched me. He told me he wanted me to touch him everywhere. And I did. I ran my fingers over his face, stroking his lips, his tongue, and his teeth. I licked his chest, sucking on his nipples. I traced kisses down his stomach, and nipped and licked the insides of his thighs and the crease of his groin. I ran my fingers up and down the inside of his legs, dragging my nails along the inside of his thighs. I sucked on his balls, flitting my tongue across and underneath towards his asshole. I entered his ass with my tongue and prodded gently, but didn't pierce him. I took his cock down my throat and jerked him off with my hand and used the other to touch his chest, pinch his nipples, and clutch his legs.

It was so easy to swallow him down. Easier than usual. And I thrust him all the way down over and over, past the back of my tongue into my throat. His balls were pressed against my chin and my nose was flattened against his abdomen. My breathe was cut off, but I continued, loving the taste and the smell of him, my lips grasping the base of his cock. I look up at him periodically because I know he likes when I do, but his eyes are closed or looking back or above him.

When I lift myself up from his cock, he rolls me onto my back, spreads my legs, and tells me to put him inside of me. M doesn't enter me when I place the head of his cock between my drenched pussy lips, instead his whispers against my moth that he wants me to beg for it. He tells me to say what a whore and slut I am, and to beg for him to fuck me. And I do. I plead for him to fuck me, telling him I need it. I say I want him to stuff me, to stretch me. He works himself into to me a bit at a time. When he's fully wedged inside of me I'm gasping for air, he's so thick and I'm so tight and hungry and wet, I am panting with pleasure.

He presses my legs back, being careful of my broken foot, and pounds me. He's completely buried in me, and I'm using the wall behind me as leverage to meet his thrusts. I'm propped up on my pillows, half sitting up, and it's a good position for me especially with my legs spread and pushed back, it angles my cunt to get the head of his cock hitting the spot that makes me cum, even ejaculate sometimes. It sends flames down my legs and across my chest. My clit throbs.

M cums across my belly, shooting puddles onto me. It seems sooner than he would usually allow himself to cum, he prefers to hold off normally, and has even gone so far as to stop me when I'm on top so he doesn't cum too soon. He feeds me his cum and I lick it from his fingers eagerly. I suck on his fingers suggestively, displaying my wantonness.

Later, I gave M a blowjob. I was trying to arouse him so I would be fucked again, but we ended up with him cumming in my mouth. I took him as deeply as before, and paid special attention to his balls and ass. I love the way his ass smells, and his asshole is so soft and slick. I put the little bullet vibrator into him, and varied the speed as I deep throat him repeatedly while cupping his balls. Every so often I'd use the wire connecting the vibe to the remote to move the bullet inside of him. I don't push it in deeper, I let lay just past his sphincter, nudged up against his prostate. M's never had the full strength of the vibe, but i did have it up a bit higher than I have before. He didn't say anything, or make much noise at all aside from clearing his throat a few time. He touched my clit briefly when I began to suck on himand then removed his hand. The next time I felt his hand was when he was about to cum, and he placed his hand to the back of my head close enough to keep me from being able to release his cock completely from my hungry mouth, yet far enough away to allow for me to continue to pump his cock with my throat. When he came he held my head down shooting down my throat as i swallowed every drop.

Laying back afterwards, we talked for a bit before sleeping. I told him I loved him, and he said he loved me too. I told him that I thought he didn't anymore. He said he did. I was surprised, and didn't know what to say beyond that. I hadn't told him with the expectation that he would say it back, I said it because that was what I was feeling.

I'm not sure how it came up, but M asked me if I thought he was "boring", or if I felt that our sex was "boring", or if I was "bored". I can't recall precisely how it was phrased. I told him I wasn't, that I have no complaints about what we do together. That I always have fun when we're together. I also reminded him that there have been times when I've asked for things, sexually, that he agreed to do, but then didn't do them.

The next morning I went ot the store to pick up some things. When he woke up I asked M what he wanted for breakfast and he chose french toast. I made him a breakfast in bed of french toast with bananas and chocolate and bacon. He watched some TV, the History channel his favorite :), and I read some more of my book. Eventually he placed my hand on his cock, signally he wanted to get frisky, and I kissed all over his body and suckled on his cock again. I climbed on top of him, knowing how much he loves that, and I bounced and ground my pussy on him. I love when he thrusts up when I'm on top, it's gets him so much deeper into me and him deep inside me drives me insane. Our rhythm was perfectly in sync and we I ended up sweaty and on my hands and knees with M's hands gripping my hips plowing into me until he came all over my back and ass.

We went to the store to get M some strings for his bass and his guitar, then the coffee shop for an iced coffee, and the little Mexican produce market that sells tamales on weekends. M was sweet to offer to get me some fruit, I've been craving fresh fruit since I broke my foot, and I said I'd just like some tomatoes. When we got back to my place we ate our tamales, and M watched a little more TV and I read a little more.

I had told M that I'd been fantasizing about giving him a blowjob on my knees with him standing above me. Maybe that got him a bit aroused because he kneeled up, naked, and pulled the covers down revealing my naked body. He put his hand between my thighs and began to rub my clit. He shuffled up close to my head, and I reached for his cock. Well, I can't touch his cock without putting it into my mouth, and I soon had him in my hot little mouth slurping away at his erection.

When I began to suck on him he removed his hand from between my thighs and I continued to work my mouth all over his cock, slipping down to nuzzle his balls. He gripped my cheek in one hand and cupped my chin in the other, slamming his cock down my throat. Between thrusts I moaned and caught my breathe as best as I could, and he would tease me by pulling out completely. Every time he emptied my mouth of his flesh I would lurch forward to gobble him back up, desperate to have him inside of me once more. He slid between my legs and fucked me until he came. It's amazing how wet I become from just sucking on his cock.

My body responds instantly to his touch. In fact, it doesn't even take me blowing M for me to get soaking wet, it can happen just from him kissing me. I am breathless from him licking my nipples. I melt seeing him bite his lip before he kisses me. I flush with pleasure when he holds my hand. I probably blushed when he kissed me at his job on Friday. He excites me as much as he ever has. Even after a year, I still ache for him. I still hunger for him.

Saturday, August 1, 2009

A Turn of Events

M did call last Monday. I hadn't expected it, but I was pleasently surprised, if a little unnerved, when we talked. I suppose he wanted to see me, too, because we ended up speaking to each other on the phone while appearing on our webcams. And my god was it good to see him. I wasn't as excited for him to see me, it was so hot that night and i was all sweaty, but looking at each other was reassuring in its own way.

Thursday night was bad. I had a bit of a breakdown. I think the strain just got to be too much for me. The not knowing. The depression. The loss. My having PMS. Just everything coming together in a perfect storm of misery and hopelessness.

By Friday afternoon I felt a bit better. I had resolved to just lay in bed watching bad TV. I thought to myself "Well, maybe M will call to chat before bed tonight. It's unlikely, but maybe. That would be nice." When I looked at my phone around 7pm to check the time, I saw that there was a text as well as a missed call from M, so I called him back.

We talked, and he wanted to come see each other. I straightened up my neglected apartment, and jumped in the shower. I shaved a bit, but I didn't give myself an enema or nair my bikini line as I would normally do, I didn't want to get my hopes up. He may not even want me to touch him, he had previously backed away from me when I had attempted to, and anyway I didn't want to get ahead of myself. It had been nearly a month since I'd seen him.

When he arrived he showed me his new bag. After going thru all of it's features, he seemed to realize he hadn't greeted me with a hug or anything, so he gripped me up in a big tight hug. It reassured me a bit that I at least wasn't going to have to worry about an occasional stray stroke. And it was nice to smell him and feel him again.

We ordered pizza, and watched Real Time on HBO ( I love Rachel Maddow!), and as we laid there watching TV, he pulled me in close beside him and had me lay my head on his shoulder as he stroked my hair. Just him reaching for me makes me melt, but when he strokes my hair I sink even further into relaxation and comfort. Still, I didn't completely allow myself to hope for too much more. I didn't dare.

When Real Time was over, I rolled on to my side, figuring we would chat some more. He took off his glasses, rolled over to face me, and nuzzled his face against my chest. His free hand came up behind my head and pulled my face down to his, and then he kissed me. And he tasted so good and his tongue filled my mouth, and it was velvety and soft, and aggresive and decisive. I didn't sense any caution in his kiss, but I was still unsure of what I should do. Nevertheless, I kissed back, with growing ardour.

His hand moved from behind my head down to my hip, and he kneaded my flesh, gripping me firmly. His knee nudged between my thighs and he pulled my leg over his hip so I was straddling him. By now our bodies were pressed tightly against each other, and the kisses were becoming more and more passionate. I don't know how to describe this all without it coming off as rushed, but even while it was happening I thought to myself how hungry we were for each other, but also that it didn't feel rushed or erratic. It was electric and exciting, but it wasn't frenzied. It was sensual.

M rolled me onto my back and settled between my legs. Kisses and kisses and more kisses. Kisses on my neck. Kisses on my collarbone. Kisses on my earlobe, and his breathe across my ear sending a thrilling shiver down my spine, making me moan out loud. And I noticed how hard I was breatheing. And we were grinding our bodies together like a couple of teenagers. That's when I realized I was already dripping wet.

We slipped off his shirt, and it was my chance to kiss along his collarbone and the tattoos I never thought I'd touch again. And his skin smelled amazing. And then my shirt came off, and he laid me back down and leaned back to look at me. He ran his hands from my shoulders down across my breasts, down my ribs and across my stomach. He leaned over me reaching for my breasts, grabbing them up in both hands, sucking on my already hard nipples.

My hands touched every exposed part of him. I dug my fingers into his shoulders, and ran my fingers up and down his back, cupping his pecs. Anywhere I could reach, anything I could grab a hold of, just to feel him.

He leaned back again, and his hands went to unbutton my jeans, and he pulled them off me. I wrapped my legs around him, but then my panties soon followed my jeans, and then his bottoms were off. Again he leaned back, and I felt his finger slide between my wet pussy lips, slipping up to my clit, then sliding back down. Up and down between my lips, and I quivered from the touch of his single finger.

He spread my thighs, wide, and he lightly kissed and licked the insides of my thighs. I felt that velvet tongue on my clit, lapping at me, and two fingers entering me. His free hand cupped my ass, and lifted me up to his mouth. I had fantasized earlier in the day about his mouth on my pussy, had been aching for it.

He climbed up from between my legs and I reached up to kiss him, licking my juices from his lips. I kissed my way down to his cock, and he moaned when I slid him into my mouth. I held his balls in my hand, and drew him deeper into my mouth. His hands were all over my body, and I couldn't take much more. I lifted my face up to him, and whispered,"Fuck me."

He pulled me on top of his lap and I wedged his cock inside of me, and slid down onto him. He remained sitting up, and I used his shoulders as leverage to work myself on top of him. Maybe because it had been nearly a month since I've fucked, or maybe because he was super hard and super thick, but I was completely stuffed. He had to keep stopping me from moving so he wouldn't cum too soon. I felt like I was going to burn up, and my cunt was involuntarily squeezing him inside of me even when I was trying to be still.

I felt none of the self conciousness I usually feel when I'm on top. I probably could have stayed up there the whole time, but I think it was too much for M. Either that or he just wanted to pound me. :D

He got me on my back, kissing my face and my neck. His hands closed around my throat and squeezed, cutting off my air. I think he got a bit distracted because I think I started to go unconcious. There was a flooding, crashing wave sound in my head. Everything was swirling, and I couldn't see. I didn't even realize it was happening until I was gasping for breathe, and I was confused where I was and what was happening. I said to M, "Wait a sec," as I caught my breathe and "came to". He cradled me close to his chest, and resumed sliding in and out of me gently, working his way back up to fucking me as hard as before.

M flipped me around onto my hands and knees and gathered my hair up into his hand as he reentered me. His left hand comes across my chest, first grabbing my breast, then clasping my right arm pressing my back against his chest. His forehead is on my left shoulder and we're both panting and moaning. I'm arching my back to get as much of him in me as possible, he lets me go and I seal my chest to the bed, grinding my ass against him like a cat in heat.

Once again he flips me onto my back, and hooks my knees over the crook of his elbows. I love this position because of how deeply he can penetrate me and the way the head of his cock butts up against that sensitive spot at the top in the back of my cunt. I have fistfuls of comforter in my hands, I'm practically hyperventilating. My head is swimming, and I can feel the wet spot growing under my ass.

Suddenly, M pulls out and brings his cock up to my face and shoves himself down my throat beginning to cum. He pulls out and jerks off into my open mouth, shuddering when my tongue wraps around the tip. I swallow everything, and we both sort of collapse his head at my feet, exhausted and gasping. I lift my head up a bit just as M does, and he reaches out for my hand to pull me to him. I get my after fuck kiss as I tuck myself into the cuddle M offers, the mingled scent of our bodies covers us like a perfume.

The sweat on our bodies hasn't even dried before M says to me, eyes closed and with a smile,"Give me a few minutes, I want to fuck you again." I giggle and snuggle in closer. It's not unusual for us to fuck multiple times in a night, but I admit I was happy to have the one time, and I was still trying to not expect too much. And I was especially pleased that he was already thinking about fucking me again.

I was smoking my after sex cigarette when I told him how my breasts were aching during the day, but that when he had grabbed them it hadn't hurt at all. I said I must have had a ton of endorphins coursing through my body. His hand creeps between my thighs and he says, "How would you like some more endorphins," and begins to pinch and toy with my clit. A bit of advice ladies, if you ever get the chance to be fingered by a bassist...take it!!! ;)

Well, of course that led to another bout of excellent fucking. And after that M took a catnap curled around me while I sat up smoking and watching the rerun of Real Time. He woke up and kissed my back, and I ran my nails across his back. M loves when I scratch his back, and he practically purrs when I do it. He murmurs that he wants to fuck again, and I have to say that really was a surprise to me. Another pleasant surprise.

So, M and I fucked again. Tho I think he was disappointed that I hadn't made my ass ready. I told him that I hadn't even been sure that he would let me touch him, nevermind fucking me, so I hadn't done much prep. I hadn't even put makeup on or done my hair, which I don't think has happened the entire time I have been with M. And I'm not even one of those girls that wears makeup every day, I wear it enough for work. But I always try to look my best for M.

After all that we were both spent. There was a little sleepy conversation before I turned out the light and rolled over to sleep. M pulled me into the curve of his body, throwing his leg over my hip. In the morning I woke up first, as is usual. He wakes up with a smile and I flatter myself that he's happy to be waking up in my bed with me. He edges over to me coaxing my arms around him. He draws me in to kiss him, but I say "No, I have morning pizza breathe. And cigarettes." He says, "My cock doesn't have a sense of smell," and I roll my eyes at him as he gives me that naughty grin of his.

We had sex once more before we run to WaWa for coffee, and M had leave early to meet up with his bandmates to travel to thier gig that night. I was pretty happy for the rest of the weekend, and I'm happy to have spent time with M. He wants to "take things slow" and I have mixed feelings about that. On the one hand it makes sense, and on the other hand it sounds like trying to walk the cat backwards.

I'm cautiosly optomistic at this point. M says he cares for me, and he says he doesn't want to be with other girls and that it just made things "complicated", and he doesn't want that. I'm inclined to agree about the desire for things to be drama free, I just hope that doesn't mean he's not taking this seriously. I guess I'll see what happens.